10 – Zombeavers (March
20)
Director: Jordan
Rubin
Writer: Al
Kaplan, Jon Kaplan, Jordan Rubin
Actors: Cortney
Palm, Rachel Melvin, Lexi Atkins, Bill Burr, Hutch Dano, Peter Gilroy, Rex
Linn, Jake Weary, Brent Briscoe, John Mayer
Genre: Thriller
Rated: R
Let’s be honest. This isn’t going to be the next Citizen Kane (1941). Hell, it might not
even be the next King Kong (1933). It
may, however, be the next Sharknado
(2013).
Believe it or not, there’s been a lot of talk about this movie
since it was first seen at the Imagine Film Festival in April of 2014.
I heard about it a couple of times at first, then nothing. I
figured it had disappeared into obscurity.
Boy, was I wrong.
The film started being mentioned around me again throughout
January and February. Apparently, it’s picked up enough steam that it’s going
to be released in theaters this month.
I acknowledge that this movie will likely not be for
everyone. In fact, I’d put money on it being terrible. Still, I hate myself a
little for it, but I can’t wait to see it.
There was never any question that it would be on this list.
It beat out movies it should have never beaten out: The Cobbler, To Write Love on
her Arms, and Danny Collins, for
instance.
I never denied I was a little strange.
9 – Home Sweet
Hell (March 13)
Director: Anthony
Burns
Writer: Carlo
Allen, Ted Elrick, Tom Lavagnino
Actors: Katherine
Heigl, Patrick Wilson, Jordana Brewster, James Belushi, Kevin McKidd, Bryce
Johnson, Alyshia Ochse, A.J. Buckley, Madison Wolfe
Genre: Comedy
Rated: R
Ok. I don’t like Katherine Heigl (Knocked Up, The Ugly Truth, Grey’s Anatomy). She lacks any sense of
professionalism and that makes me grumble a little when I see her getting work
over better actresses. However, this is the part she was born to play: sweet
and innocent on the outside, crazy as hell on the inside.
It won’t even require acting.
I’m still skeptical because, well, Heigl, but the trailer
looks too good to ignore.
8 – Run All Night
(March 13)
Director: Jaume
Collet-Sera
Writer: Brad
Ingelsby
Actors: Liam
Neeson, Joel Kinnaman, Vincent D’Onofrio, Bruce McGill, Genesis Rodriguez, Ed
Harris, Common, Holt McCallany, Boyd Holbrook
Genre: Action/Adventure
Rated: R
Obligatory old guy in an action film!
Hey, in this film you get two veteran old guys for the price
of one movie ticket.
Liam Neeson (Taken 3,
A Walk Among the Tombstones, The Lego Movie) is automatically a draw for
action films. It’s his bread and butter, he does nothing better. Ed Harris (Snowpiercer, Radio, A Beautiful Mind) is
a veteran as well and just adds a little extra to this movie. Add to them the
amazingness of Vincent D’Onofrio (The
Judge, Law and Order: Criminal Intent, The Break-Up), who still gives me
chills when I watch Full Metal Jacket,
and there’s no way this movie could go wrong.
Seriously, even if the plot is terrible and the script was
written by 3rd graders, those three giants would make it epic.
7 – Unfinished
Business (March 6)
Director: Ken
Scott
Writer: Steve
Conrad
Actors: Vince Vaughn,
Tom Wilkinson, Dave Franco, Sienna Miller, James Marsden, Nick Frost, June
Diane Raphael, Ella Anderson, David C. Bunners
Genre: Comedy
Rated: R
My reason for wanting to see this film so much, is stupid.
Aside from the fact that it seems like a great “switch your
brain off” film, it’s got Dave Franco (Now
You See Me, Warm Bodies, Fright Night). My fiancé teases me constantly
because I seem to like the sibling of the more well known actors.
I prefer Dave to James Franco (This is the End, The Interview, As I Lay Dying).
I like Liam Hemsworth (The
Hunger Games, Paranoia, The Expendables 2) more than Chris Hemsworth (Red Dawn, The Avengers, The Cabin in the
Woods).
I would watch Maggie Gyllenhaal (Frank, White House Down, Secretary) before I’d watch Jake Gyllenhaal
(Accidental Love, Prince of Persia: Sands
of Time, Donnie Darko).
I could go on, but you get the point.
Sure, the movie looks funny and it might even be a great
trailer. Never-the-less, the moment I saw Dave Franco was in it, it got added
to list.
Alright, if the trailer had sucked, I’d have passed… so I
guess that had something to do with it.
6 – Chappie (March
6)
Director: Neill
Blomkamp
Writer: Neill
Blomkamp, Terri Tatchell
Actors: Sharlto
Copley, Hugh Jackman, Dev Patel, Sigourney Weaver, Watkin Tudor Jones, Yolandi
Visser, Jose Pablo Cantillo, Brandon Auret
Genre: Sci-fi/Fantasy
Rated: R
I think Hugh Jackman (Reel
Steel, X-Men: Days of Future Past,The Fountain) has a thing for robots.
That being said, Chappie
looks adorable… and potentially heartbreaking.
To be honest, I expect a relatively recipe plot from this
film, but that doesn’t make me want to see it any less. After all, I could be
wrong. I know nothing more than what is in the trailer.
It has a decent cast and seems to have an interesting story.
5 – Home (March
27)
Director: Tim
Johnson
Writer: Tom J.
Astle, Matt Ember, Adam Rex
Actors: Rihanna,
Jim Parsons, Steve Martin, Jennifer Lopez, Matt Jones, Dominique Monfery
Genre: Family
Rated: PG
From the makers of The
Croods and How to Train Your Dragon.
Are you kidding me? I not only want to see this movie, I expect it to be DAMN
good.
The bar is high. I want to see them meet it.
4 – Serena (March
27)
Director: Susanne
Bier
Writer: Christopher
Kyle, Ron Rash
Actors: Bradley
Cooper, Jennifer Lawrence, Toby Jones, Rhys Ifans, Sean Harris, David Dencik,
Kim Bodnia, Sam Reid, Ana Ularu
Genre: Drama
Rated: R
This movie was filmed, completely, by 2012. It premiered in
October of 2014 at the London Film Festival.
Why has it taken so long to come out? There was no drama,
just post-production hell. Conflicting schedules for fixing some of the dialog
that was drowned out by a plane overhead. That’s all.
That being said, Jennifer Lawrence (The Hunger Games, X-Men: Days of Future Past, House at the End of the
Street) and Bradley Cooper (American
Sniper, Guardians of the Galaxy, The Hangover) are the most amazing pair of
leads in any film.
I hear mixed reviews about the movie, but with a pair like
Lawrence and Cooper, I find it difficult to listen to the haters.
I’ll judge for myself, thanks.
3 – Cinderella (March
13)
Director: Kenneth
Branagh
Writer: Chris
Weitz, Aline Brosh McKenna
Actors: Lily
James, Richard Madden, Cate Blanchett, Hayley Atwell, Helena Bonham Carter,
Derek Jacobi, Holliday Grainger, Stellan Skarsgard, Sophie McShera, Nonso
Anozie, Ben Chaplin,
Genre: Family
Rated: PG
The last live-action version of Cinderella that I legitimately loved was Ever After: A Cinderella Story (1998). I’m looking forward to
seeing what happens with this film. I’m hoping it gives the fantasy a more
realistic quality, like Ever After
did.
I grew up on Cinderella.
Despite my relatively tomboy nature, those kinds of fairy tales still speak to
me. My inner child is squee-ing.
2 – Dead Rising:
Watchtower (March 27)
Director: Zach
Lipovsky
Writer: Tim Carter
Actors: Rob Riggle,
Jesse Metcalfe, Meghan Ory, Virginia Madsen, Dennis Haysbert, Harley
Morenstein, Keegan Connor Tracy, Aleks Paunovic, Julia Benson
Genre: Horror
Rated: Unrated
Video game movies are sketchy. We all know it. There is a
sad lack of decent video game movies out there. Plenty of bad ones, though.
Still, whenever one comes out – especially one with my
favorite subject (zombies) – I’m going to shell out the money to see it.
Every time.
Without fail.
Doesn’t hurt that I really like Dead Rising, the game, and that the trailer looks pretty bad-ass.
1 – The Divergent
Series: Insurgent (March 20)
Director: Robert
Schwentke
Writer: Akiva
Goldsman, Brian Duffield, Mark Bomback, Veronica Roth
Actors: Shailene
Woodly, Theo James, Miles Teller, Ansel Elgort, Kate Winslet, Jai Courtney, Zoe
Kravitz, Octavia Spencer, Suki Waterhouse, Naomi Watts, Jonny Weston, Daniel
Sae Kim, Mekhi Phifer, Ben Lamb, Maggie Q, Rosa Salazar, Keiynan Lonsdale,
Emjay An, Ray Stevenson, Ashley Judd
Genre: Sci-fi/Fantasy
Rated: PG-13
I recently read the Divergent
series. After reading the first book, I watched the movie for the first time…
and I was furious.
Holy shit, what did they do? They lopped off some incredibly
important parts. There were scenes I was dying for and they never happened.
People were supposed to die, that never died. I don’t even know how Insurgent is going to make up for all
the shit that was left out.
I compare the first Divergent
movie to the first Percy Jackson
movie (which basically had a completely different plot than the book) and the
third Harry Potter movie (which left
out so much, the series never fully recovered).
Still, I have to see Insurgent.
The books were amazing and the ending broke me. I have Four, which is a book of short stories
Veronica Roth wrote about the character: Four. I haven’t had the strength to
read it yet. I look at the cover, and my chest aches. I’ll get there
eventually, but I’ll likely finish watching all the movies first.
Luckily, the director of the first Divergent movie, Neil Burger (Limitless,
The Lucky Ones, The Illusionist) is not on board for the rest of the
series. He’s a great director, but terrible for Divergent.
Robert Schwentke (The
Time Traveler’s Wife, R.I.P.D., Tattoo) is taking on Insurgent, but he’s also taking on Allegiant: Part 1. That means there’ll be some uniformity in the
feel between the two movies. Maybe he’ll even be able to fix some of the errors
of his predecessor.
Let’s hope.
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