Lars and the Real Girl (2007)

Number Rolled: 61

Movie Name/Year: Lars and the Real Girl (2007)

Genre: Comedy

Length: 106 minutes

Rating: PG-13

Director: Craig Gillespie

Writer: Nancy Oliver

Actors: Ryan Gosling, Emily Mortimer, Paul Schneider, R.D. Reid, Kelli Garner, Nancy Beatty, Doug Lennox, Joe Bostick, Liz Gordon, Nicky Guadagni, Patricia Clarkson

A lot of recipe movies have been hijacking my dice lately. I mean, I know it’s random, and that’s going to happen now and again because recipe movies are really common, but it put me in the wrong frame of mind for this movie. In fact, a half hour in, it caught me so off guard I had to pause it, get up and walk around for a minute or two before I continued. There’s no recipe for this movie, in fact, I don’t think the director himself could duplicate it. It was a completely original script that blew my mind.

The movie is about a loner introvert, Lars (played by Ryan Gosling), that finds it increasingly difficult to be around people and to maintain relationships of any sort. After a co-worker brings to his attention the existence of life-like sex dolls, he orders one. However, he doesn’t see the doll as a sex toy. In fact, he begins to see it more as a girlfriend, taking her wherever he goes and basically doing date-related activities. At the suggestion of a psychologist, his family plays along with his delusion in the hopes of aiding him.

Whoever labeled the genre of this movie was either drunk or just deciding from a two sentence blurb about the movie, what it might possibly be like. I sat down, all prepared to watch a recipe movie with a few laughs, and got a completely original movie that made me stare at the screen with my chin hanging low and my chest hurting. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really not complaining; but do yourself a favor and don’t believe anyone who tells you differently, this movie was undoubtedly a drama. There were comedic moments, but it was a drama.

Ryan Gosling was amazing in his part. You would never believe the suave, sexy guy from “Crazy, Stupid, Love” was the same guy playing this twitchy, introverted, delusional guy. I absolutely believed in the character he portrayed. I believed in all the characters. Hell, I even managed to get attached to the sex-doll’s existence in this movie.

I would highly recommend this movie. Very highly. Honestly, it’d probably be a perfect five if I hadn’t expected a comedy. It’s like taking a drink and expecting it to be iced tea when it turns out to be iced coffee. The iced coffee might be good, but it makes for very bad tea.

Overall Opinion – 4.5/5

Crawlspace (1986)

Number Rolled: 47

Movie Name/Year: Crawlspace (1986)

Genre: Horror

Length: 80 minutes

Rating: R

Director: David Schmoeller

Writer: David Schmoeller

Actors: Klaus Kinski, Talia Balsam, Barbara Whinnery, Carole Francis, Tane McClure, Sally Brown, Jack Heller, David Abbott, Kenneth Robert Shippy, David Schmoeller

Well, my brain officially needs to be scrubbed with bleach. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I disliked this movie.

This movie was about a doctor, specializing in euthanasia, that owns a boarding house for women and gets his rocks of crawling through the heating ducts of the house spying on them and causing chaos. It also turns out that he’s a serial killer, with a love for slow torture and traps, who believes he’s supposed to follow in his nazi-father’s footsteps. After each kill he plays Russian roulette with himself, and every time the bullet doesn’t fire he figures that just means he’s good to go on continuing his “kill all the people” philosophy.

Low budget movies don’t bother me. In many cases, actually, I prefer them. The smaller budget forces the director to be more creative on how he realizes his vision. I have seen a lot of movies that have taken a small budget and done spectacular things with it. This was not one of those. Though, to be fair, I’m not all that certain a bigger budget would have helped all that much.

The movie was horrible. There was a twenty minute chase scene that was one of the most boring things I’ve ever seen in a film. The acting was worse, except for the main bad guy, Klaus Kinski, who was ridiculously creepy and did a great job of it.

I wouldn’t watch this movie again if someone paid me to. The only reason it’s not below a one is because the main actor really is made for horror movies, he was amazing. I hope I will eventually get to see him in a movie that doesn’t suck. Also, despite the horrible execution, the plot was actually relatively original for its time.

Overall Opinion – 1.5/5

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003)

Number Rolled: 75

Movie Name/Year: How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003)

Genre: Comedy

Length: 115 minutes

Rating: PG-13

Director: Donald Petrie

Writer: Michele Alexander, Jeannie Long, Kristen Buckley, Brian Regan, Burr Steers

Actors: Kate Hudson, Matthew McConaughey, Kathryn Hahn, Annie Parisse, Adam Goldberg, Thomas Lennon, Michael Michele, Shalom Harlow, Robert Klein, Bebe Neuwirth

I hate when this happens. On Wednesday I watched and blogged on “She’s All That.” And, look, I’ve randomly rolled for it again! Ok, so “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” is pretty much the same movie, without the ugly duckling part, for a slightly older audience and with different actors.

This movie stars Kate Hudson as Andie Anderson, a writer who wants more than the ‘How To’ column she’s writing, for a fashion magazine. After witnessing a friend go through a very predictable break-up, she pitches the idea to write a story on how to lose a guy in ten days. Meanwhile, Matthew McConaughey, playing Ben Barry, is trying to land a huge diamond deal at his advertising agency and he’ll get the deal if he can make a girl fall in love with him by the day of his company’s party.

If you don’t already know the ending to this movie from the above blurb, then you’ve never watched a chick flick in your life.

It’s got nearly the EXACT recipe of “She’s All That,” but I feel like they accomplished the goal a touch better. Seemed a little less forced, or maybe it was because it was aimed at my demographic and I ate it up, whichever.

I am a fan of Kate Hudson and I don’t outright hate Matthew McConaughey. However, I do have the same problem with McConaughey that I have with Katherine Heigl. As well as he does it, most of the time, he has only one character. He’ll play in a hundred different movies, but it’s really the same character over and over and over again. I’m not saying he’s a terrible actor, but he’s definitely a specialist and it keeps me from being over impressed with any of his work.

Overall Opinion – 3/5