Thursday, September 18, 2014

Bringing Up Bobby (2011)

Number Rolled: 88
Movie Name/Year: Bringing Up Bobby (2011)
Genre: Independent
Length: 95 minutes
Rating: PG-13
Affiliated Companies: Dutch Tilt Films, Fu Works, Head Gear Films, Metrol Technology, Rinkel Film
Executive Producer: Chad Burris, Cole Frates, Phil Hunt, David Johndrow, Maryann Johndrow, Renee Knox, Steve Knox, David Manning, Compton Ross
Director: Famke Janssen
Writer: Cole Frates, Famke Janssen
Actors: Milla Jovovich, Spencer List, Rory Cochrane, Dalton Olive, Eric Starkey, Dan Corley, Bill Pullman, Marcia Cross, Braden Fowler, Renata Batista, Lauren Analla, Ana Anderson, Justin Hall

Olive is a con-woman. She’s also a thief. The label she prefers most of all, however, is mother. In an effort to give her 10-year-old son all the things she’s never had, she will pull any heist and con any person; all-the-while, teaching her son to do the same.

Netflix has this labeled a comedy and an independent comedy as well as simply independent. I don’t know who categorizes these films, but someone was drunk. There were, if I’m generous, about five slightly funny lines in the entire movie.

My suggestion? Don’t go into Bringing Up Bobby thinking it’s a comedy. It’s a drama. I don’t even agree with the possibility of labeling it a dramedy.

That out of the way, I’ll admit I’m disappointed. I saw Milla Jovovich (The Fifth Element, Resident Evil Series, Ultraviolet) and Bill Pullman (Independence Day, The Equalizer, Torchwood: Miracle Day) top-billed and got excited. Both of them are amazing actors and I’ve loved almost every movie/TV show I’ve seen them in.

There was nothing wrong with Pullman’s performance. His character was a little lackluster, but I believe that was a script or story problem. Jovovich, however, was a different story. Everything about her performance seemed forced, even ridiculous at times.

I’d like to forget she even took part in this film.

The story itself had some merit and the big picture of the movie wasn’t awful. I wish there was a better ending and that the script didn’t feel… wrong. There was a lot of misplaced slang, which I don’t find forgivable. This isn’t a period piece. It shouldn’t have been that difficult to at least get the slang correct.

Bringing Up Bobby was completely mediocre, not something I’d voluntarily re-watch.

Rotten Tomatoes Critic Score – 17%
Rotten Tomatoes Audience Score – 37%

Netflix’s Prediction for Me – 3.7/5
Trust-the-Dice Score2.5/5

Movie Trailer: 

Monday, September 15, 2014

Spiders 3D (2013)

Number Rolled: 16
Movie Name/Year: Spiders 3D (2013)
Genre: Sci-Fi & Fantasy
Length: 89 minutes
Rating: PG-13
Affiliated Companies: Nu Image Films
Executive Producer: Boaz Davidson, Danny Dimbort, Lati Grobman, Avi Lerner, Trevor Short
Director: Tibor Takacs
Writer: Joseph Farrugia, Tibor Takacs, Dustin Warburton
Actors: Christa Campbell, Patrick Muldoon, William Hope, Shelly Varod, Jon Mack, Sydney Sweeney, Sarah Brown, Christian Contreras, Pete Lee-Wilson, Atanas Srebrev, Misha Dibono, Jesse Steele, Vincenzo Nikoli

When a piece of Russian technology falls from space, it leaves a hole in the ceiling of a train station in New York. Jason, an MTA employee, has to try and clear the debris before rush hour. Unfortunately, the space debris brought something along for the ride, spiders.

There are two type of creature features.

The first is the kind that tries to be bad. The films that fit into this category tend to either fail by adding no humor or by not going far enough. It’s not as easy to create a movie that’s “so bad, it’s good” as people think.

The other kind of creature feature is one that tries to be realistic and respectable.

There are very few truly respectable creature features out there. I may have loved Sharknado and the sequel, but it wasn’t because they were respectable, they fell into the “so bad, it’s good” category. An example of a respectable creature feature would be Jurassic Park.

As you go through the world of creature-related movies, you’re not going to find a lot of Jurassic Park’s. You will, however, find a lot of movies trying to be as good and as serious.

Spiders tried. It wanted so badly to be respectable. To be fair, it had some of the best special effects I’ve ever seen in this kind of creature feature. Unfortunately, movies cannot be judged on effects alone.

The story started off slightly ridiculous, but worth it. In the beginning, it had kind of an Arachnophobia (1990), from space, feel to it. As the film dragged on it lost the decent parts to the completely ridiculous. It didn’t help that the actors were terrible.

It tried. Unfortunately, it didn’t quite meet its goal and the finished product is nothing but a lame joke.

Rotten Tomatoes Critic Score – 14%
Rotten Tomatoes Audience Score – 11%

Netflix’s Prediction for Me – 1.4/5
Trust-the-Dice Score1.5/5

Movie Trailer: