Monday, July 3, 2017

Zoombies (2015)

Number Rolled: 45
Movie Name/Year: Zoombies (2015)
Tagline: Uncaged. Undead.
Genre: Action, Horror, Sci-Fi
Length: 87 minutes
Rating: TV-14
Production Companies: The Asylum
Producer: Paul Bales, Lauren Elizabeth Hood, David Michael Latt, David Rimawi
Director: Glenn Miller
Writer: Scotty Mullen
Actors: Ione Butler, Andrew Asper, LaLa Nestor, Kim Nielsen, Marcus Anderson, Brianna Joy Chomer, Ivan Djurovic, Aaron Groben, Kaiwi Lyman-Mersereau, William McMichael, Reuben Uy, Isaac Anderson, Tammy Klein, Ikaika, Joe Conti, Noa Pharaoh, Jennifer Titus, Michael Delgado, Jay Kwon, Bryan Sloyer
Stunt Performers: Jay Kwon, Bryan Sloyer

Blurb from Netflix: A zombie virus turns a zoo full of animals undead and bloodthirsty. If they escape the zoo, the whole city will be in danger.

Selina’s Point of View:
Ah, Asylum. How I’ve missed thee.

It’s been a long time since we’ve had an Asylum film, hasn’t it? Well, they haven’t changed since our last one. Aside from the one or two movies/series where the production company strikes gold, the rest of their films are borderline unwatchable or just barely mediocre.

Hey, even a stopped clock is right twice a day.

What I would like to remind everyone before I continue, is that we here at Trust the Dice don’t judge a film by much more than entertainment value. 

Is it enjoyable to watch? That’s the question we seek to answer. We may occasionally make comments about a technique or use a technical term, but what it boils down to is whether or not you would rather be watching grass grow than the film.

If I were to technically critique this film, there’d be a lot to say. The man in a monkey suit that was portraying Kifo looked nothing like the computer generated Kifo that the camera kept cutting to. There were continuity problems, plot holes, script issues, and the acting was horrific. That’s just a few, among many, issues.

Entertainment wise, I was amused. It was like watching Jurassic Park (1993) if it’d been written by a six-year-old and directed by high schoolers.

I do have to throw some credit in the direction of child actor LaLa Nestor (Dimension 404, A Lovely Afternoon, Lemonade Mafia), though. She had a couple of really interesting moments. I could see her growing out the B-movie game and into something more tangible.

Although, I probably wouldn’t choose to watch this movie alone again, if you want some cheap amusement and you’ve gathered a group of friends, it would be fun to watch like that.

It was definitely more of a ‘mock it together’ than ‘mock it alone’ film.

Cat’s Point of View:
This movie just might fall under the ‘be careful what you wish for’ category. I’m not talking about the plot of the film, however.

I’ve been wanting to watch this movie since I first noticed it on Netflix. The concept had all the makings for something really cool – or something utterly horrible. I did, at least, realize that from the outset.

Do I think this was something really horrible? No – but it wasn’t all that good, either.

There’s some funny camerawork, a few gaping plot holes, some unrealistic action (mostly in physical reaction of characters being ‘thrown’), and that just scratches the surface. I’m afraid there wasn’t enough humor or camp to elevate the material so that the weaker elements of the movie didn’t stand out as much or could be forgiven.

I will give the production team props for the effects, though. Sure, they weren’t always the best – and they certainly weren’t on par with most of mainstream Hollywood; but they were fairly decent for a B-movie such as this.

The cast was diverse and interesting. No one was wooden in their performances, but I don’t really feel like there was enough character development in some places. Even with that said, the core of the underlying story was clear; so at least there’s that.

When I can get interrupted with 10 minutes left of a movie and not get irked about the delay of finding out what happens in the ending, I know I’m not all that invested in the film to begin with. (Brunch at IHOP and a 5-person Pok√©mon Go raid against a Tyranitar boss was incentive enough. But I digress…)

All said, I’m fairly meh about the movie. I doubt that I would recommend it to others when there are so many better B-movies out there. If they ever make a sequel, though, I might just give it a try to see if they step up their game.

Speech Available: English
Subtitles Available: English

Rotten Tomatoes Critic Score – None
Rotten Tomatoes Audience Score – 16%
Metascore - None
Metacritic User Score – None
IMDB Score – 3.4/10

Trust the Dice: Selina’s Rating3/5
Trust the Dice: Cat’s Rating2.5/5

Movie Trailer:

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