"We're not critics. We're professional fan-girls." --- This blog is dedicated to movies and the entertainment industry. We use random selection to bring into light the best and worst of streaming films and entertainment news.
Streaming Service: Amazon Prime Movie Name/Year: Speak No Evil (2024) Genre: Horror, Mystery &
Thriller, Drama Length: 1h 50min Rating: R Director: James Watkins Writers: James Watkins, Christian
Tafdrup, Mads Tafdrup Based On: A 2022 Danish-Dutch movie
of the same name. Actors: James McAvoy, Mackenzie
Davis, Scoot McNairy, Aisling Franciosi, Alix West Lefler, Dan Hough, Kris
Hitchen, Motaz Malhees, Jakob Højlev Jørgensen
IMDb Blurb: A family is invited to
spend a whole weekend in a lonely home in the countryside, but as the weekend
progresses, they realize that a dark side lies within the family who invited
them.
Selina’s Point of View: I’ll be the first to admit I didn’t love the original version of
this film. I felt they were going for slow tension, but it ended up feeling
more like drama. I mentioned that critics loved the film, but that audience
scores were probably going to reflect something else.
It looks like I was right, since the 2022 version of Speak No
Evil is sitting at 84% for critics and a mere 58% for audiences.
The one thing I did like was the ending. It was bleak and
horrifying. Everything you could want from a psychological, slow-burn horror.
It was memorable, to say the least. In fact, it makes me remember the entire
film as better than it actually was. Going back to my old review confused me,
because my 1.5 rating definitely should have been slightly higher just for the
impact of that ending. I think it should be more of a 2.5.
That brings us to the 2024 version.
I’m fairly certain that Americanizing this film ruined it.
Speak No Evil (2024) felt more like
the slow-burn the 2022 version was going for. The acting in both was
infallible, but the direction and production quality of those small off-putting
moments that raised the tension throughout the film hit harder. I knew what was
coming, and I still felt tense. I’m assuming that’s when some producer butted
their nose in and reminded the director that Americans don’t love down endings
and need action.
They replaced that memorable, lasting, bleak ending with an action
sequence—the big battle. Took the bite right out of it and made it as
forgettable as any other film.
With the upgrade in quality of the majority of the film, having
the same brutal ending would have made it a near-perfect horror offering. It
would have catapulted the 2024 version of Speak No Evil to the top of my
list. I’d be praising it to anyone willing to listen and throwing it on at
Halloween parties for years to come. Instead, they pulled out all its teeth and
made it a joke. Padding that ending means that I won’t remember Speak No
Evil (2024) by next week.
Shame.
Cat’s Point of View: I remember rolling my eyes and asking “why?” out loud when I
learned that Speak No Evil (2022) had been remade. I had enjoyed the
original, which is also currently available for streaming as well (just don’t
forget to turn on your subtitles unless you speak Dutch or Danish). We had
reviewed the original movie when it premiered on Shudder at the time of its
release.
Before watching for this review, Speak No Evil (2024)
was one of the 2 final hold-outs from the movies in my top 10 of September2024’s Top 20 list. This one was a solid #6 on my must-see countdown. The only
reason I had waited this long to watch it was so that I could have a fresh
experience for this review, so that Selina and I could compare the two films
together. I reasoned that if I let time lapse after watching, I likely could
have gotten the movies mixed up. Now that I’ve seen the newest iteration of Speak
No Evil, I am positive there would be no mistaking one for the other; even
though they do follow a lot of the same points within the plot.
Selina and I were of two minds about the 2022 movie. I felt
that the slow burn and awkward drama precursor to the horrific sharp left turn
in the final act caused the film to have a more lasting impact. The bleak
nature of the story left me staring at the screen with my soul weeping.
I didn’t know at the time, but I’ve since read that the original
writer/director wanted the finale of the first Speak No Evil to be
inexplicable in order to stand out from films where everything gets spoon-fed
to an audience and tied up with a bow by the end. While I understand and
applaud that decision, it would probably be the root of why there has been such
a kneejerk reaction to the abruptness of the change in tone for the final act of
the 2022 film.
The new Speak No Evil handled the pacing a little
more deftly, though managed to maintain the slowly building awkward and
sinister tension that permeated the story. I applaud the changes that tweaked the fresh
vision of this horrific scenario of wolves masquerading as sheep and the
inevitable outcome.
I also discovered that some of the differences between the
original movie and its remake were specifically created to gear the newer
telling of the story to American audiences. The finale of the original Speak
No Evil was intended as a satirical reflection on Danish culture; which, it
seems, they felt wouldn't have resonated as well with the target audience. With
that frame of reference, I understand why they made some of the changes.
The production team was absolutely brilliant in casting James
McAvoy (Glass, The Sandman, The Book of Clarence). When he has embodied
an antagonistic role, he is absolutely terrifying. This is about as far away
from Narnia as you can get. His range is phenomenal. For that reason, I would
have watched the new iteration of Speak No Evil even if I didn’t have a
vested interest in seeing if making an “American remake” of the story would
screw everything up or not.
I also liked how this new story ‘flipped the script’ between
the parent of action and their more milquetoast counterpart. The ending is
brutal and horrific for different reasons this time around, and the haunting
aftermath was palpable as the credits began to roll.
Out of the pair, I’d have to say that I prefer the remake.
Both, however, are fantastic at accomplishing exactly what they set out to do.
If you enjoy a psychological, twisty, and thrilling horror
tale maybe check this new Speak No Evil out – even if you didn’t vibe
with the first one… and maybe even if you did.
Actors: Imogen Poots, Aleyse
Shannon, Lily Donoghue, Brittany O'Grady, Caleb Eberhardt, Cary Elwes, Simon
Mead, Madeleine Adams, Nathalie Morris, Ben Black, Zoë Robins, Ryan McIntyre,
Mark Neilson, Lucy Currey, Jonny McBride
IMDb Blurb: A group of female
students is stalked by a stranger during their Christmas break. That is until
the young sorority pledges discover that the killer is part of an underground
college conspiracy.
Cat’s Point of View:
What can I say, I can’t resist watching a movie where the plot focuses on
something happy and wholesome, like Christmas, and flips it into something dark
and sinister. I’m always curious as to what lengths the story will go to in
order to pull it off – and whether or not it can claim success at such. When that
concept was coupled with a chance to watch Cary Elwes (Saw, Stranger Things,
Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part One) and Imogen Poots (Fright
Night, Green Room, Vivarium) in action – both actors I greatly admire – I
was eagerly anticipating my experience viewing Black Christmas.
Of course, I did realize at the outset that this movie was a
remake. Whenever someone tries to revamp a horror movie, the odds tend to be
stacked against the film unless it bringing something to the table that was missing
from the original that made it lacking. Of course, then there’s entirely
rebooting the concept to take it into another direction. That option tends to
be less successful more often, finding backlash from fans of the original in
addition to the usual suspects among critics.
This particular Black Christmas had a lot to answer
for, considering this wasn’t just a remake but the second remake of the
original 1974 movie. From what I’ve gathered while reading up on this 2019 version,
the story was intentionally brought in a different direction than its
predecessors rather than producing a shot-for-shot redo. Aside from the title
and broad plot elements involving dead sorority girls on the cusp of Christmas
break, there aren’t any direct tie-ins with the other Black Christmas
movies.
This updated Black Christmas landed on screens amid
the #MeToo Movement. It attempted to give us a solid feminist story where the
strength of sisterhood was pitted against the patriarchy and long-standing
collegiate gender bias and the struggles of campus rape-culture. These messages
were loud and clear and fairly bashed in the face of the audience. Don’t get me
wrong – especially in the case of the latter topic – subtlety and subtext
wouldn’t have done that particular message justice, but everything else felt a
little heavy-handed. At one point I found myself thinking, yes I get it that
this is a feminist movie but wasn’t this supposed to be a slasher? What
happened to the slashing?
Therein, I believe, was one of the main downfalls of this
iteration of Black Christmas – it was PG-13. Bending this story to meet
the rating requirement just to reach a wider audience pretty much slashed the Achilles
tendon of the whole production. There was no gore, the method whereby the
antagonists attempt to accomplish their goals felt weak and didn’t have enough
to hold it together, and there weren’t enough laughs or even screams to
counterbalance all the heavy-handed politics.
I loved the core connections and sisterhood among the girls
and how they supported each other, for the most part- but that was generally
it. Everything else just felt rushed and I perpetually felt like I missed something
important that happened before the movie even began. While all of the twinkly
lights were pretty, they couldn’t out-shine the fact that there was little of
the promised horror actually in the film.
To be clear, I didn’t hate Black Christmas. I just don’t think it accomplished what it
wanted to, and it wouldn’t be my choice for a re-watch during its titular
season… or really at all.
Streaming Service: Peacock Movie Name/Year: Five Nights at Freddy's (2023) Genre: Horror, Mystery, Thriller Length: 1h 49min Rating: PG-13 Production/Distribution: Universal Pictures,
Blumhouse Productions, ScottGames, Peacock Director: Emma Tammi Writer: Scott Cawthon, Seth Cuddeback, Emma Tammi, Chris Lee Hill,
Tyler MacIntyre Actors: Josh Hutcherson, Piper Rubio, Elizabeth Lail, Matthew
Lillard, Mary Stuart Masterson, Kat Connor Sterling, Grant Feely, Asher Colton
Spence, David Huston Doty, Liam Hendrix, Jophielle Love Blurb from IMDb: A troubled security guard begins working at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. During his first night on the job, he realizes that the night shift won't be so easy to get through. Pretty soon he will unveil what actually happened at Freddy's.
Selina’s Point of View: It’s great to be
back to reviews, and we obviously wanted to start with a film we’ve been
looking forward to for a long time. The frustration of not being able to talk
about Five Nights at Freddy’s when it was finally set to come out had us
practically spitting. If the production companies hadn’t been so damn greedy… But I digress. I didn’t watch Five
Nights at Freddy’s alone. A bunch of us got together and watched it on discord
the night it came out on Peacock. It was our first discord movie night and, I
have to say, doing it for this film was a good idea. There are so many little
meme-able moments woven throughout. Watching it with friends and getting to
talk about those moments as they occur, then theorizing after the film is done,
heightened the whole experience for me. No doubt you’ve
seen the rotten tomatoes scores. Critics had a field day shitting all over it
(30%), while fans brought the audience score all the way up to 87%. In this
case, I see where critics are coming from, but as a fan of the games, I also
see where the audience is coming from. I’m inclined to lean more toward the 87
than the 30. Let me start with
what I agree with the critics on. The tone was a
little… odd. Huge sections of Five Nights at Freddy’s are dedicated to the
main character, Mike, and his guilt over the loss of his little brother. Those
scenes are completely serious and leave little room for levity. Then there are
other scenes where people are getting attacked by a cupcake or having fort-time
with the animatronics. I love a good
horror comedy. So, my issue is not that there were moments of humor and light
mixed in with scares, it’s that the tone was so drastically different between
those scenes that they didn’t even feel like they were part of the same film.
Most of those horror moments weren’t scary. I think there were a few to many
cuts made. It all might have made more sense with the added scenes. I have gotten my
hands on some of the script that was cut after they opted to make the movie
PG-13. When they were going for an R-rated, there were some seriously scary and
brutal scenes written in that script. I really believe this is one flick that
would have benefited from that R-rating.
Now that we have
the bad out of the way, let’s talk about all the good. Any fan of video
games knows that the companies rarely get it right when they create an
adaptation. We all wince when we first see the announcements. It’s as if the
companies don’t bother to research the games. Instead, they seem to create
movies based on a list of character names and plot guessing. That is not an
issue here. Scott Cawthon (Freddy
& Friends: On Tour, Josh the Octoling Shorts, Five Nights at Freddy's:
Security Breach) is the creator of Five Nights at Freddy’s. He not
only had a hand in writing this adaptation, but he also had control over who
directed it and the people tapped to play the characters. He shied away from
solely using CGI, using live action options when he could. He had our favorite
murderous animatronics created by Jim Henson’s Creature Shop – which is a
choice you have to respect. It gave them an uncanny valley feel when they
moved, as if you could see the people trapped inside, but it didn’t make them
too human either. Because Cawthon
was involved throughout every part of the film, Five Nights at Freddy’s
sticks extremely close to the actual lore of the games (and books) from a time
when he was in control of them. Then there’s the
acting, which you will find no fault in. Josh Hutcherson (Epic,
Ultraman, The Hunger Games) leaves it all on camera whenever he’s working. He
doesn’t have a phone-it-in mode. Regardless of the part he always gives it his
all, and that’s very apparent here. Matthew Lillard (The Bridge, Scream, SLC
Punk!) was also a fantastic choice for
Steve Raglan. I have a lot of reasons for this belief, but they stray into
spoiler territory, so I’m not going to put them here. I will say that most of
the meme-able content comes from him. Piper Rubio (Holly
& Ivy, Pretzel and the Puppies, Unstable) was believable in her part as
well. Children actors in horror films have it rough, because they aren’t given
the whole story of what they’re acting in. Rubio manages to hide that fact from
the audience, which worked out well. When it comes
down to it, fans of Five Nights at Freddy’s are going to enjoy the film.
It’s a good first step that sets up the second to be even better.
Cat’s Point of View: Fans of the Five
Nights at Freddy’s (FNAF) game series have been waiting for the
movie adaptation for years now. There was a rollercoaster of anticipation and
frustration as the will-they or won’t-they of the development process moved
along like a herd of turtles. While we were waiting, we got a taste of
murderous animatronic insanity with Willy's Wonderland (2021). Fans of FNAF
knew it was derivative, but it gave us a splatter-fest and crazy chaos to tide
us over a little while – not that it was planned that way or anything. That was
just the way it worked out. It whet our appetites while we still hungered for
‘the real thing.’ Now that the
official Five Nights at Freddy’s has hit big and small screens alike,
fans and audiences new to the stories have rushed to watch our hopes realized…
all the while crossing our fingers that it wouldn’t disappoint. I loved it. I
also watched Five Nights at Freddy’s with my daughter, and it was fun to
watch her reactions to the movie. She just happened to have the remote while we
were watching via streaming, and she actually paused the film in a couple
places so she could hop out of her chair and bounce around with glee at little
moments and Easter Eggs that excited her. You see, she has been a monumental
fan of FNAF for years now. She watched so many play-throughs of the
games and has devoured all the game theories and lore content available online.
FNAF was her introduction into horror. Most of my knowledge of this game
series, its characters, and associated concepts came from her excited
explanations before I ever even played the nerve-jangling games, myself. (I
give serious props to VR players. I noped out within minutes.) The point I’m
getting around to is that we enjoyed the experience together and have great
respect for the final product that arrived amidst a time of turmoil in the film
industry. Five Nights at Freddy’s has the stamp of approval of my
resident superfan.
Was it perfect?
Not exactly. This movie did, however, treat the lore well and even gave a nod
to the online gamer streamers that helped launch FNAF into the viral hit
the games have been. The plot-twist in Five Nights at Freddy’s was also
very satisfactory and caught me off-guard in a way that caused me to gasp and
then face-palm as my mind hurriedly put the clues together in retrospect. The cast was
amazing. Josh Hutcherson was a great pick for the brother in a desperate enough
situation to take the overnight security job. I have enjoyed watching his
cinematic journey ever since he brought me to tears in Bridge to Terabithia
(2007). I was also seriously giddy that Matthew Lillard was also involved in Five
Nights at Freddy’s. It’s been a while since I’ve seen him in a horror
flick. If anyone was going to take the FNAF’s mastermind and creator
Scott Cawthon’s place as “phone guy,” Lillard was perfect. Young Piper Rubio also
impressed me with her performance. The only issue I
had with Five Nights at Freddy’s was that the movie didn’t quite capture
the same level of dread and suspense that the games are well known for.
Understandably, for cinematic purposes it couldn’t be exactly like the gameplay,
but that element was slightly lacking. I know that director Emma Tammi (The
Wind, The Left Right Game, Into the Dark) is capable of that very feeling
because her atmospheric and suspenseful movie The Wind (2018) was
steeped in that eerie emotion. Perhaps future installments in this burgeoning
franchise might take that step to round out the experience. I wasn’t even mad
that the production team took a PG-13 route with minimal gore. That’s not
really what this series has been about at its core. It’s a lot of psychological
horror and jump-scares. Audiences know that bloody and horribly gruesome things
have happened, but it didn’t need to be front and center on-screen for the
movie to be effective. The FNAF concept would stand up to a more graphic
treatment, but for this first foray into this realm of haunted children’s
attractions, this was satisfactory. Five
Nights at Freddy’s
is a film I have recommended to friends already and we will likely be watching
it again in the future. In the meantime, we will anticipate and cross our
fingers that the studio and production team grant our wish for sequels
exploring some of the other Five Nights at Freddy’s lore and characters.
Rotten Tomatoes Critic Score –30% Rotten Tomatoes Audience Score – 87% Metascore – 33% Metacritic User Score – 8.0 IMDB Score –5.5/10 Trust the Dice: Selina’s Rating – 3.5/5 Trust the Dice: Cat’s Rating – 4.5/5 Movie Trailer:
20 – Go West
(7/19) Production/Distribution:
Brothers’ Ink Productions, JK Studios, Purdie Distribution Director: Stephen
Meek, Jeremy Warner Writer: Adam
Berg, Whitney Call, Mallory Everton, Jason Gray, Stacey Harkey, Natalie Madsen,
Stephen Meek, Matthew Meese, James Perry, Jeremy Warner Actors: Sean
Astin, Mallory Everton, Whitney Call, Matthew Meese, Jason Gray, Natalie
Madsen, Stephen Meek, Jeremy Warner, Stacey Harkey, Adam Berg, James Perry Genre: Comedy,
Western Rated: Unrated Length: Unknown IMDb Blurb: A crazy group of pioneers brave the harsh elements
and numerous mishaps to travel thousands of miles out west to find a place to
call home. I usually don’t go for westerns, but this film looks a whole
lot more like Blazing Saddles (1974) than anything else from the genre. I’m
not saying it’s going to be the same level as that film, but it does seem to
have a similar, if updated, sense of humor. It’s parody at its best. Not perfect, but funny and worth
giving a chance. The July 19th release is limited, a wider release will
happen on August 11. 19 – Biosphere
(7/7) Production/Distribution:
Duplass Brothers Productions, IFC Films, AMC+ Director: Mel
Eslyn Writer: Mark Duplass,
Mel Eslyn Actors: Sterling
K. Brown, Mark Duplass Genre: Comedy,
Drama, Mystery Rated: Unrated Length: 1h 46min IMDb Blurb: In the not-too-distant future, the last two men on
earth must adapt and evolve to save humanity. Biosphere is tricky. The plot looks interesting – I do
love a good apocalypse story, after all – but there are only two actors
involved. Now, that isn’t a deal breaker of course, it just means that the
entire thing is riding on their backs. If they throw themselves into it and
have the talent to back it up, then it will be an incredible watch. But if they
falter, at all, it could wind up feeling like watching paint dry. Sterling K. Brown (Black Panther, This is Us, The Rhythm
Section) is a great actor. I have no doubt that he can hold my interest for
the run-time of Biosphere. That said, I’m much more ambivalent toward
Mark Duplass (Language Lessons, Big Mouth, Duck Butter). I don’t have a
problem with him, but his name rarely stands out to me when I’m looking through
the cast of films. I’m cautiously optimistic, but I couldn’t justify putting Biosphere
any higher on my list. 18 – Call Her
King (7/6) Production/Distribution:
Blacklight Entertainment, BET+ Director: Wes
Miller Writer: Wes
Miller Actors: Naturi
Naughton, Jason Mitchell, Lance Gross, Nicholas Turturro, Johnny Messner, Tobias
Truvillion, Han Soto, Barry Ratcliffe Genre: Action,
Thriller Rated: Unrated Length: Unknown
Length IMDb Blurb: After the courthouse is hijacked by Black Caesar,
brother of Sean Samuels, who has just been sentenced, Judge Jaeda King must
rely on her strength and skills to find a way to end the standoff, save the
hostages, and make her escape. Call Her King doesn’t look overly original, but it
does look like a wonderful, turn-your-brain-off, action. I believe there’s a
place for that kind of movie, there are days when that’s what I prefer.
Especially since the world always seems to be ending around us these days. Something
about watching a bad-ass take down antagonists, while making things better,
just does it for me. I’m very much looking forward to seeing what Call Her
King does. 17 – Quicksand
(7/14) Production/Distribution:
Dawn’s Light, Elemental Stories, Sangre Films, Two Twenty Two Pictures, AMC+,
Shudder Director: Andres
Beltran Writer: Matt
Pitts Actors: Allan
Hawco, Carolina Gaitan, Sebastian Eslava, Andrés Castañeda Genre: Thriller Rated: Unrated Length: Unknown
Length IMDb Blurb: Follows a married couple almost divorcing who
become trapped in quicksand while hiking through a rainforest in Colombia. They
will battle the elements of the jungle and must work together in order to
survive. (This movie was supposed to come out last month but was delayed
til July. This was my blurb from last month.) Did anyone else who grew up in the 80s expect quicksand to
be more of a threat than it actually is? All our movies and shows utilized it. The
Neverending Story (1984) down-right traumatized us with it. Finally, we
have a horror movie that is based completely on it. Quicksand looks interesting and claustrophobic –
despite the fact that it takes place outside. I find that to be an intriguing effect.
I’m looking forward to seeing what they do with it. 16 – The Miracle
Club (7/14) Production/Distribution:
Zephyr Films, City Films Entertainment, City Films I, Ingenious Media, ShinAwil
Productions, Sony Pictures Classics Director: Thaddeus
O’Sullivan Writer: Joshua D.
Maurer, Timothy Prager, Jimmy Smallhorne Actors: Laura
Linney, Kathy Bates, Maggie Smith, Agnes O’Casey, Mark O’ Halloran, Mark
McKenna, Niall Buggy, Hazel Doupe Genre: Comedy Rated: PG-13 Length: 1h 31min IMDb Blurb: There's just one dream for the women of Ballygar to
taste freedom: to win a pilgrimage to the sacred French town of Lourdes. The Miracle Club takes place in Ireland and if I didn’t
include it, Cat would have kicked my butt. This is technically her month, but
she had an emergency. That said, I do want to take her opinion into account as
least some. (Though her list can be found at the bottom of this.) Laura Linney (Ozark, Falling, The Roads Not Taken),
Kathy Bates (Are You There God? It’s Me Margaret, American Horror Story,
Moose), and Maggie Smith (A Boy Called Christmas, The Lady in the Van,
My Old Lady) are all GOATS. Not of the ‘old’ variety, either. When you put these
legends in one place it’s impossible not to notice. Putting them all in the
same comedy drama is a recipe for success. It feels like the drama aspect is going to lead to something
tissue-worthy, but up until then the comedy will be second to none. 15 – Sympathy For
the Devil (7/28) Production/Distribution:
Hammerstone Studios, Capstone Global, Signature Films, RLJE Films Director: Yuval
Adler Writer: Luke
Paradise Actors: Nicolas
Cage, Joel Kinnaman Genre: Horror, Thriller Rated: Unrated Length: 1h 30min IMDb Blurb: After being forced to drive a mysterious passenger
at gunpoint, a man finds himself in a high-stakes game of cat and mouse where
it becomes clear that not everything is as it seems. Much as I loved The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent,
a return to good-old crazy Nic Cage (Renfield, Willy’s Wonderland, Pig)territory works for me. When he plays his most insane characters is when I think
he shines the best. There’s something about those characters that other actors
just can’t recreate. I’m excited to see what direction the story takes. If Cage’s
character really chose Joel Kinnaman’s (The The Suicide Squad, Altered
Carbon, The Killing) for a reason, or if it was more on the random side.
Depending on what they do with it, both options could work. At the very least, Sympathy for the Devil is bound to
be insane. 14 – The Out-Laws
(7/7) Production/Distribution:
Happy Madison Productions, Netflix Director: Tyler
Spindel Writer: Evan
Turner, Ben Zazove Actors: Poorna
Jagannathan, Ellen Barkin, Nina Dobrev, Adam Devine, Pierce Brosnan, Michael
Rooker, Lauren Lapkus, Richard Kind, Julie Howery, Blake Anderson, Derek Russo,
Laci Mosley Genre: Action,
Comedy, Crime Rated: R Length: 1h 35min IMDb Blurb: A straight-laced bank manager about to marry the
love of his life. When his bank is held up by infamous Ghost Bandits during his
wedding week, he believes his future in-laws who just arrived in town, are the
infamous Out-Laws. Adam Devine (Workaholics, Pitch Perfect, Magic Camp)
is hit-or-miss for me. Sometimes he can be a touch too cringey. I believe he’ll
be balanced out by his co-stars in The Out-Laws. Even when she’s in a comedy, Nina Dobrev (Redeeming Love,
Love Hard, The Vampire Diaries) tends to be more on the grounded side, so do
Pierce Brosnan (Mamma Mia, The November Man, The World’s End) and
Michael Rooker (Guardians of the Galaxy, The Walking Dead, The Suicide Squad).
I think because that cringe is outweighed, The Out-Laws will wind up
feeling humorous without dipping too far into that parody-esk feel. It’s a funny concept, I just can’t put it higher than this
on the list because I don’t have quite so much faith in the writers/director. 13 – The Beanie
Bubble (7/28) Production/Distribution:
Apple Original Films, Apple Studios, Imagine Entertainment, Apple TV+ Director: Kristin
Gore, Damian Kulash Writer: Kristin
Gore Actors: Sarah
Snook, Elizabeth Banks, Geraldine Viswanathan, Zach Galifianakis, Kurt YaegerSweta
Keswani, Jason Burkey Genre: Comedy,
Drama Rated: R Length: 1h 50min IMDb Blurb: Ty Warner was a frustrated toy salesman until his
collaboration with three women grew his idea into the biggest toy craze in
history. I was the perfect age to be absolutely obsessed with beanie babies
when they came out. My first job was at a collectible store that sold them, so
I got a discount on each one I bought. And, as an irresponsible teenager with
money for the first time in my life, I spent way too much on them. They’ve since
all been sold or given away, but it’s a nostalgic part of my past none-the-less. When I heard there was a movie coming out about the creators,
I was all-in. Even before I learned who would be a part of it. In any other month, it would have probably made my top 10,
but this month is just packed with some of the best movie offerings we’ve seen
in a long time. The Beanie Bubble looks funny, but that thread of
drama running through it is also apparent. I don’t know the story of the actual
creators, or how close this film will stick to it, but I’m guessing there will
be some tissues needed at some point. I’m really looking forward to it. 12 – Resident
Evil: Death Island (7/25) Production/Distribution:
Capcom Company, TMS Entertainment, Sony Pictures Home Entertainment Director: Eiichirô
Hasumi Writer: Makoto
Fukami Actors: Erin
Cahill, Kevin Dorman, Matthew Mercer, Stephanie Panisello, Nicole Tompkins Genre: Animation,
Action, Adventure Rated: R Length: 1h 27min IMDb Blurb: D.S.O. agent Leon S. Kennedy is on a mission to
rescue Dr. Antonio Taylor from kidnappers, when a mysterious woman thwarts his
pursuit. Meanwhile, B.S.A.A. agent Chris Redfield is investigating a zombie
outbreak in San Francisco, where the cause of the infection cannot be
identified. The only thing the victims have in common is that they all visited
Alcatraz Island recently. Following that clue, Chris and his team head to the
island, where a new horror awaits them. I’m still, and always, a fan of Resident Evil. Moreso
the games than the movies, but I have enjoyed some of the flicks too. Some of
them may be a little brain-dead, but there’s a place for those on hard days
when you just want to vegetate. In the case of Resident Evil: Death Island, the story
looks as if it’s going to be something fans can be proud of, while the animation
looks super clean. Death Island is bound to be over-the-top zombie fun.
I am, however, a little concerned about the sound quality. Even though the
trailer is directly from the Sony YouTube page, it still seems a little sus.
That could mean that it wasn’t given the attention it deserves – but it could
have also just been on my side. (I would doubt that, though, since all the other
trailers are coming through just fine.) I guess we’ll see. 11 – Paradise
(7/27) Production/Distribution:
NEUESUPER, Netflix Director: Boris
Kunz Writer: Simon
Amberger, Peter Kocyla, Boris Kunz Actors: Numan
Acar, Lucas Lynggaard Tønnesen, Iris Berben, Kostja Ullmann, Diana Krueger,
Lukas von Horbatschewsky, Matthias Ziesing, Egle Lekstutyte Genre: Action,
Sci-Fi, Thriller Rated: Unrated Length: 1h 56min IMDb Blurb: After his wife is forced to give up 40 years of her
life as payment for an insurance debt, a man desperately searches for a way to
get them back. Paradise seems about as chilling as a thriller can
get. At the same time, it gives a kind of metaphor into what people mean when
they talk about billionaires ‘hoarding’ money. It’s a lot easier to see exactly
what it means when they show it as years of someone’s life instead of a dollar
bill that’s hard to put into context. I have a feeling it’s not going to be the easiest watch, but
absolutely worth it in the end.
10 – Talk to Me
(7/28) Production/Distribution:
Bankside Films, Causeway Films, Head Gear Films, Metrol Technology, Screen
Australia, Talk to Me Holdings, The South Australian Film Corporation, A24 Director: Danny
Philippou, Michael Philippou Writer: Bill
Hinzman, Danny Philippou, Daley Pearson Actors: Sophie
Wilde, Joe Bird, Alexandra Jensen, Otis Dhanji, Miranda Otto, Marcus Johnson,
Alexandria Steffensen, Zoe Terakes, Chris Alosio, Ari McCarthy Genre: Horror,
Thriller Rated: R Length: 1h 34min IMDb Blurb: When a group of friends discover how to conjure
spirits using an embalmed hand, they become hooked on the new thrill, until one
of them goes too far and unleashes terrifying supernatural forces. I find myself completely hypnotized by the trailer for Talk
to Me. The visuals are terrifying. Even parts that would otherwise come
across as basic jump scares feel like there’s more to them. The part where one
of the characters is repeating ‘run’ is tense as hell. The only reason I don’t have this higher on my list is because
there’s a small red flag in the beginning. The voices don’t entirely sync up to
the lips at one point. It could be nothing, just an editing mishap, but it
could also be a sign of those in charge trying to hide a sub-par script. I’m
hoping that’s not it, because it seems like a solid horror flick otherwise. 9 – Insidious:
The Red Door (7/7) Production/Distribution:
Alliance, Blumhouse Productions, Screen Gems, Sony Pictures Entertainment
(SPE), Stage 6 Films, Columbia Pictures Director: Patrick
Wilson Writer: Scott
Teems, Leigh Whannell Actors: Rose
Byrne, Patrick Wilson, Ty Simpkins, Hiam Abbass, Lin Shaye, Andrew Astor,
Juliana Davies, Sinclair Daniel Genre: Horror,
Mystery, Thriller Rated: PG-13 Length: 1h 47min IMDb Blurb: The Lamberts 10 years after the last installment,
as Dalton begins college. I’ve never really gotten into the Insidious films.
Every time one comes out, the trailer looks amazing, but then when it’s time to
sit down and watch something there’s always a different movie that draws my
attention more. I think what’s kept me away from Insidious is the
belief that it’s connected to the Conjuring universe, which I’ve just
been corrected on. So, I think it’s time for me to sit down and really watch
the rest of the series in anticipation of The Red Door. The mystery aspect of Insidious: The Red Door is more
inviting to me than I thought it would be. The trailer engages me enough to make
me want to know what’s going on. It’s impressive, considering my ambivalence up
until now. This is, allegedly, the last installment of Insidious.
You know how Hollywood goes, though, if it’s successful enough that could be up
for debate. From what the trailer is showing, it may go down that route. 8 – They Cloned
Tyrone (7/14) Production/Distribution:
Federal Films, MACRO, Made With Love Media, Netflix Director: Juel
Taylor Writer: Tony
Rettenmaier, Juel Taylor Actors: Jamie
Foxx, John Boyega, Teyonah Parris, David Alan Grier, Kiefer Sutherland, J.
Alphonse Nicholson, James Moses Black Genre: Action,
Comedy, Mystery Rated: R Length: 2h 2min IMDb Blurb: A series of eerie events thrusts an unlikely trio
onto the trail of a nefarious government conspiracy in this pulpy mystery
caper. They Cloned Tyrone is going to be one of the funniest
movies out there. It has a stunning cast and a fun plot. The idea of people being cloned due to some government conspiracy,
while someone with the comedic timing of Jamie Foxx (Strays, Day Shift, Just
Mercy) is running around is hilarious. It’s still also topical, especially
with the history of non-consensual experimentation on people of color and other
minorities. To be fair, I’d have added They Cloned Tyrone to the
list just with the excitement of seeing Foxx, Teyonah Parris (Candyman,
Charm City Kings, Chi-Raq), and David Alan Grier (Joe Pickett, The Cool
Kids, Sprinter) work off each other. It’s going to be a killer film. 7 – Bird Box
Barcelona (7/14) Production/Distribution:
Chris Morgan Productions, Dylan Clark Productions, Netflix Studios, Nostromo
Pictures, Netflix Director: David
Pastor, Àlex Pastor Writer: David
Pastor, Àlex Pastor Actors: Georgina
Campbell, Mario Casas, Diego Calva, Michelle Jenner, Patrick Criado, Leonardo
Sbaraglia Genre: Horror,
Mystery, Sci-Fi Rated: Unrated Length: 1h 50min IMDb Blurb: After an entity of mysterious origin annihilates
the world's population causing those who observe it to take their lives,
Sebastián and his daughter begin their own great adventure of survival in
Barcelona. The first Bird Box (2028) was a lot of fun. Much like
A Quiet Place (2018), it robbed the characters of one of their senses and
put them in a dangerous world. And, despite the similarities, they did wind up being
two very different movies. Not showing the big bad at all was one of the best things Bird
Box did. It allowed audiences to use their imagination to create something terrifying
for them. It’s a strategy that is too often not taken in horror films, and it’s
one that works. I hope that Bird Box Barcelona continues down the same
road, allowing the antagonist creatures to remain a mystery. The biggest
mistake I believe they can make is to show us some kind of creature. No matter
how well done, it would remove some of the tension. Luckily, the trailer makes
it seem as though they will be taking that same route. I’m glad they’ve opted to go into a different story in a different
part of the world. As much as I’d enjoy checking in with the original story and
seeing how that’s going, there wasn’t a whole lot to do with that that wouldn’t
mess up what we’ve already gotten. Seeing a whole new perspective from new
characters was absolutely the way to go about it. There’s a bit of concern that the change in writer/director could
mean a change in tone, but Àlex and David Pastor (The Head, Self/less, Carriers)
are brilliant with apocalyptic stories. If there is a change in tone, it just might
be for the better. 6 – Cobweb (7/21) Production/Distribution:
Lionsgate, Media Capital Technologies, Point Grey Pictures, Vertigo
Entertainment Director: Samuel
Bodin Writer: Chris
Thomas Devlin Actors: Lizzy
Caplan, Antony Starr, Cleopatra Coleman, Luke Busey, Woody Norman Genre: Horror, Thriller Rated: Unrated Length: 1h 28min IMDb Blurb: Horror strikes when an eight-year-old boy named
Peter tries to investigate the mysterious knocking noises that are coming from
inside the walls of his house and a dark secret that his sinister parents kept
hidden from him. The trailer for Cobweb does a good job of showing
that it was inspired by The Telltale Heart. Obviously, it’s not the same
story, but the inspiration is apparent. What I love about the direction the film takes is that I can’t
predict it from the start. There are a lot of different ways it can go. All the
supernatural stuff could be real, or just part of the kid’s nightmares. The
parents could have a body hidden from someone they killed, or from someone the
kid killed. There are a ton of possible outcomes. That means it will be more
interesting to watch than the basic jump-scare fare that we’ve become used to. It seems like Cobweb will be a solid horror flick. 5 – Mission:
Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (7/12) Production/Distribution:
Paramount Pictures, Skydance Media, New Republic Pictures, TC Productions, Bad
Robot Director: Christopher
McQuarrie Writer: Erik
Jendresen, Christopher McQuarrie Actors: Rebecca
Ferguson, Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Pom Klementieff, Shea Whigham, Vanessa
Kirby, Rob Delaney, Simon Pegg, Cary Elwes, Ving Rhames Genre: Action,
Adventure, Thriller Rated: PG-13 Length: 2h 43min IMDb Blurb: Ethan Hunt and his IMF team must track down a
dangerous weapon before it falls into the wrong hands. I’m not much of a Mission Impossible (1996-)girl,
but you can’t write a Top 20 for movies coming out in July of 2023 without
acknowledging this one. Tom Cruise (Top Gun: Maverick, Edge of Tomorrow, Jack
Reacher) does all his own stunts and pours his heart and soul into each of these
films. He’s a talented guy, regardless of anything else. He never does anything
without doing it 100%, often to a fault. That does tend to make his movies
worth dropping the theater money on. If you’re a fan of the Mission Impossible films, this
is a must-see. Especially since it’s part one of what is supposed to be the
finale to the flicks. 4 – Joy Ride
(7/7) Production/Distribution:
Lionsgate, Point Grey Pictures Director: Adele
Lim Writer: Cherry
Chevapravatdumrong, Teresa Hsiao Actors: Stephanie
Hsu, Ashley Park, Sherry Cola, Sabrina Wu, David Denman, Meredith Hagner, Annie
Mumolo Genre: Comedy Rated: Unrated Length: 1h 35min IMDb Blurb: Follows four Asian-American friends as they bond
and discover the truth of what it means to know and love who you are, while
they travel through Asia in search of one of their birth mothers. What I thought would be a basic buddy comedy in the vein of Girls
Trip (2017) took a hell of a left turn in the trailer. Suddenly there are cocaine
mules and fake K-pop stars singing Cardi B. No doubt there’s going to be a bunch of cringe in Joy
Ride, which is not my favorite, but there’s also a lot of heartfelt story
as well. Aside from the story of friendship, there’s also the plot addition of
one of the main characters looking for answers in a homeland they never knew. That
has the potential to get extremely deep. Done right, it might even lead to some
ugly crying. Now, this is Adele Lim’s (Dynasty, Reign, Life Unexpected)
directorial debut, but she’s credited as a writer for some beloved flicks such
as Crazy Rich Asians (2018) and Raya and the Last Dragon (2021).
Being a good writer doesn’t necessarily make someone a good director, but I
have a lot of faith in her. She’s been gathering writing credits for just over
20 years, and I think she has the know-how to make her directorial debut shine. Both writers, Cherry Chevapravatdumrong (Awkwafina is
Nora from Queens, The Orville, Resident Alien) and Teresa Hsiao (Awkwafina
is Nora from Queens, American Dad!, We Bare Bears) have credits writing for
Family Guy (1999-). I know that’s not everybody’s humor, but I happen to
love the show. I feel like that gives me a clue as to what the majority of the
jokes will be like – and I’m here for it. I believe Joy Ride is going to strike a balance
between heartfelt and funny that will delight audiences. 3 – Haunted
Mansion (7/28) Production/Distribution:
Walt Disney Productions, Rideback, Walt Disney Pictures, Walt Disney Studios
Motion Pictures, Walt Disney Studios Home Entertainment Director: Justin
Simien Writer: Katie
Dippold Actors: Jamie Lee
Curtis, Winona Ryder, Rosario Dawson, Jared Leto, Danny DeVito, Owen Wilson, Dan
Levy, LaKeith Stanfield, Tiffany Haddish, Hasan Minaj Genre: Comedy,
Drama, Family Rated: PG-13 Length: Unknown IMDb Blurb: A single mom named Gabbie hires a tour guide, a psychic,
a priest, and a historian to help exorcise her newly bought mansion after
discovering it is inhabited by ghosts. If you put LaKeith Stanfield (Sorry to Bother You, Uncut
Gems, Judas and the Black Messiah) in a movie, I’m going to see it. I don’t
know if I’ll enjoy the film, but I know from the jump that I’ll enjoy his part
in it. The man is brilliant. I’ve seen him take on films that are absolute
stinkers and still shine like the god-damn sun in them. After all, I fell in
love with his acting after watching Death Note (2017) which was
otherwise objectively bad. I must not have been the only one, because, since 2017, Stanfield
has been cast in some seriously amazing projects. To put it in perspective: he’s
been in 14 full-length feature films/TV shows since then and only 1 of them has
been deemed rotten on Rotten Tomatoes (by either audience or critics). That
means he has roughly a 93% success rate for his films. Clearly, either only the
best creators are interested in him – or, more likely, he chooses his projects
carefully. Either way, I will follow him to all the films he does. Blindly. Aside from Stanfield, they got Jamie Lee Curtis (Halloween,
Everything Everywhere All at Once, Knives Out), Winona Ryder (Stranger
Things, Destination Wedding, Beetlejuice), Rosario Dawson (Clerks III, The
Lego Batman Movie, Luke Cage), Danny DeVito (Matilda, It’s Always Sunny
in Philadelphia, Jumanji: The Next Level), Owen Wilson (Loki, Paint,
Marry Me), Dan Levy (Schitt’s Creek, Happiest Season, Degrassi: The Next
Generation), Tiffany Haddish (Like a Boss, Keanu, Night School), Hasan
Minhaj (The Daily Show, No Hard Feelings, Goatface), and more. It’s an
absolutely stacked cast. It just so happens that Haunted Mansion looks good. I’m
a little surprised there’s a PG-13 rating. The original Haunted Mansion
(2003) starred Eddie Murphy (Dreamgirls, Dolemite is my Name, Shrek) and
was undoubtedly made for kids. Then there was Muppets Haunted Mansion
(2021) which was also a kid’s film. Both previous films were rated PG. The trailer for this Haunted Mansion looks like it’s
geared more toward older teens and adults. There’s some actual ghost-based
horror in it. I think this is going to be a new look at an old favorite. I’m
looking forward to it. 2 – Oppenheimer
(7/21) Production/Distribution:
Universal Pictures, Atlas Entertainment, Syncopy Director: Christopher
Nolan Writer: Christopher
Nolan, Kai Bird, Martin Sherwin Actors: Josh
Hartnett, Florence Pugh, Cillian Murphy, Robert Downey Jr., Emily Blunt, Matt
Damon, Olivia Thirlby, Jack Quaid, Gary Oldman, Gustaf Skarsgård, Kenneth Branagh,
David Dastmalchian, Rami Malek Genre: Biography,
Drama, History Rated: R Length: 3h IMDb Blurb: The story of American scientist J. Robert Oppenheimer and
his role in the development of the atomic bomb. Although Oppenheimer is not a horror, there’s no
doubt in my mind that the story of the title character’s life and ‘accomplishment’
is going to be harrowing. To say the least. It’s a story that’s more than worth
watching play out. The choice of Cillian Murphy (Inception, 28 Days Later,
Sunshine) for the title role was the right one. He’s capable of bringing weight
to the performance that might have been missed by many others. He’s joined by a
staggering amount of talent that would take me weeks to write about in any way
that does the cast honor. Oppenheimer is just about a guaranteed success. 1 – Barbie (7/21) Production/Distribution:
Heyday Films, LuckyChap Entertainment, Mattel Films, Mattel, Warner Bros. Director: Greta
Gerwig Writer: Greta
Gerwig, Noah Baumbach Actors: Margot
Robbie, Kingsley Ben-Adir, Ryan Gosling, Hari Nef, Ariana Greenblatt, Helen
Mirren, Michael Cera, John Cena, Simu Liu, Will Ferrell, Kate McKinnon, Rhea
Perlman, America Ferrera, Dua Lipa, Issa Rae, Alexandra Shipp, Ncuti Gatwa Genre: Adventure,
Comedy, Fantasy Rated: PG-13 Length: 1h 54min IMDb Blurb: To live in Barbie Land is to be a perfect being in
a perfect place. Unless you have a full-on existential crisis. Or you're a Ken. I don’t know what I was expecting the Barbie movie to
be about, but I can tell you that it wasn’t what the trailer showed. In fact,
this is another film I was surprised to find a PG-13 rating for. I 100% thought
it would be for little kids. I’d say the only thing I got that I knew I would get was oversaturated
pinks and pastels. They hurt my eyes, but anything other than that would have
felt unbelievably wrong. The trailer looks incredible. Margot Robbie (Suicide
Squad, The Wolf of Wall Street, Babylon) embodies the presence of the
Barbie we all know. Seeing Ryan Gosling (Blue Valentine, Drive, The Gray Man)
as a peppy Ken doll makes me laugh just by the thought of it. I always
associate him with sarcastic banter. I have no idea how that’s going to
translate to the rose-colored glasses of his character but I’m dying to find
out. I love that every single Barbie or Ken doll featured in the
film represents a doll that actively exists somewhere in our world. That means
there should be a touch of nostalgia for just about anyone who goes to see it.
What I find most interesting is that it’s written and
directed by Greta Gerwig (Lady Bird, Little Women, Nights and Weekends).
Most of the film is from the viewpoint of characters that are significant naïve
and viewing the world through an unmarred perspective of innocence. Gerwig is
not a happy-go-lucky story creator. Her stories have a sense of realism and
understanding of the world around her. That makes me certain that this bright
and peppy flick is going to have a few more realistic twists that people won’t be
able to peg from the jump. As tempting as it may be to bring young children to see it,
I doubt this Barbie film will be for them. I, however, will be seeing it
ASAP.
