Sunday, January 7, 2024

5 Worst New Movies of 2023

According to: Selina
 
 
[Note: These are the worst new movies of the year that we’ve reviewed on Trust the Dice. If it wasn't reviewed on the site, it's not eligible.]
 
5 – The Lair
 

Reviewed on: January 23
Genre: Action, Horror, Sci-Fi
Rated: Unrated
Length: 1h 37min
Selina’s Rating: 2
Cat’s Rating: 3.5
 
IMDb Blurb: When Royal Air Force pilot Lt. Kate Sinclair is shot down over Afghanistan, she finds refuge in an abandoned underground bunker where deadly man-made biological weapons - half human, half alien - are awakened.
 
I barely even remember The Lair to be honest. It wasn’t bad so much as it was unmemorable.
 
4 – The Out-Laws
 

Reviewed on: July 10
Genre: Action, Comedy, Crime
Rated: R
Length: 1h 35min
Selina’s Rating: 1
Cat’s Rating: 2
 
IMDb Blurb: A straight-laced bank manager about to marry the love of his life. When his bank is held up by infamous Ghost Bandits during his wedding week, he believes his future in-laws who just arrived in town, are the infamous Out-Laws.
 
There was a lot of great acting in The Out-Laws, but it also had an overdone concept and SO much cringe that it was hard to even focus on what was happening. This kind of comedy might have done better in the 90s. For now, it was just obnoxious.
 
3 – Peppergrass 
 

Reviewed on: June 14
Genre: Thriller
Rated: Unrated
Length: 1h 34min
Selina’s Rating: 1
Cat’s Rating: 2.5
 
IMDb Blurb: During a pandemic, a pregnant restaurateur tries to rob a priceless truffle from a reclusive veteran.
 
When you’ve got a film with only one or two characters on screen for any length of time, they better be perfect at what they’re doing. While the actors weren’t awful, they didn’t command our attention. The movie was also badly marketed. We thought we were going into an action-packed thriller, not a wilderness survival. Maybe if we’d known what to expect, our opinion would have been more forgiving.
 
2 – Quicksand
 

Reviewed on: July 12
Genre: Thriller
Rated: Unrated
Length: 1h 26min
Selina’s Rating: 1
Cat’s Rating: N/A
 
IMDb Blurb: Follows a married couple almost divorcing who become trapped in quicksand while hiking through a rainforest in Colombia. They will battle the elements of the jungle and must work together in order to survive.
 
There were some parts of Quicksand that worked. The story had an interesting hook to it, but the majority of the time we were left with two relatively bad actors alone on screen. It wasn’t worth the time it took for a single watch.
 
1 – Skinamarink 
 

Reviewed on: February 13
Genre: Horror, Mystery
Rated: Unrated
Length: 1h 40min
Selina’s Rating: 1
Cat’s Rating: 2
 
IMDb Blurb: Two children wake up in the middle of the night to find their father is missing, and all the windows and doors in their home have vanished.
 
Critics loved Skinamarink and it’s not hard for me to imagine why, but it flew way over our heads. It was not the kind of film to hold onto the kicking and screaming attention span of those of us with inattentive ADHD. We’re just not the target audience.

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