The Last House on the Left (1972)

Number Rolled: 3

Movie Name/Year: The Last House on the Left (1972)

Genre: Horror

Length: 84 minutes

Rating: UR

Director: Wes Craven

Writer: Wes Craven, Ulla Isaksson

Actors: Sandra Peabody, Lucy Grantham, David Hess, Fred J. Lincoln, Jeramie Rain, Marc Sheffler, Richard Towers, Cynthia Carr, Ada Washington, Marshall Anker, Martin Kove, Ray Edwards

Admittedly, I added this movie to my Netflix Instant Queue by accident. A bunch of friends had been telling me to watch a movie that I THOUGHT was this one. Apparently I misheard or misremembered what they said because they couldn’t possibly have been suggesting that I watch this crap. My friends just aren’t that mean.

So, after I spent five minutes repeating the phrase, “What the fuck?” over and over again, I figured out the best way to describe this film. It is the perfect blend of the Brady Bunch, Home Alone and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Maybe with a bit of Beverly Hillbillies. My eye is twitching just thinking about it. I might be having a stroke from losing so many brain cells at once.

Ok, all kidding aside, this movie was bi polar. You have a rape scene followed by upbeat music to a party setup. Then you have another torture scene, followed by a comedic scene between the sheriff and his deputy that isn’t needed and seems to be there just to kill time.

Now, look. I like Wes Craven. Nightmare on Elm Street. The Hills Have Eyes (I have yet to see the 1977 version, keep this in mind). Hell, even Scream. These are all household names of the horror movie genre. I would bag on him, but this WAS his first feature film. I’m not sure HOW it became a feature film, but it was his first and he obviously learned from his mistakes.

I did find the plot interesting. However, with the horrible way it was laid out and the horrible acting and the horrible camera work and the horrible script… I find it impossible to say I really enjoyed any of it.

The best part of the film? Near the end a blade of grass or something gets blown into camera lens.

Overall Opinion – 1.5/5